As I grow older (as I've come to now, do) I realize more and more how little I'm in control. Short years ago, I remember envying my mother, uncles, and pretty much any older person EVER; all on the belief that they were somehow free-er than me and somehow better. Now, at the peak of my twenty years of existence, have realized that envy was an ugly color on me and that we usually envy that which we don't understand. It has been the common belief for some time now (always) that we envy that which we want. Really, what is it that we want though? Money? Power? Sex? All of that and more? No, I see now that the simplicity of life lies under something more...grotesquely simple. WE JUST WANT TO BE UNDERSTOOD. Really, I swear it.
I mean, of course there are other things, love being the one that just screams at me.
Envy is a funny thing, and even though it gets a bad rep, I have personally come to the understanding that envy is just a person like ourselves. A mirror image if you will; it shows us not who we are but who we could be, who we WERE. Envy is a misunderstood person, just as we all were, have been and will be.
This was a short realization, perhaps a wrong one or perhaps, too spot on. Regardless, the clock continues to tick and tock and dance. Shall we join it?
Deep...very deep..
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